Monday, July 26, 2010
Saturday, July 24, 2010
I have...
postpartum depression after having this child...
This is what he does when you aren't looking. He likes to lay on the hardwood floors downstairs because it's cooler- even with the air on. Apparently he is too lazy to actually get up to get his bone(s) to chew on so he uses our moulding.
Upstairs bathroom
Let's not forget thehorrible puppy phase
Who me??????
I have no words. no comment.
This is what he does when you aren't looking. He likes to lay on the hardwood floors downstairs because it's cooler- even with the air on. Apparently he is too lazy to actually get up to get his bone(s) to chew on so he uses our moulding.
Upstairs bathroom
Let's not forget the
Who me??????
I have no words. no comment.
Sunday, July 18, 2010
Sunday Funday
This one was from Saturday. View Master. An actual moment of silence. ahhhhhh.
She wiggled her tooth all day on Saturday. Asked Daddy to pull it Saturday night when he got off work and he wouldn't- said it wasn't ready. She cried when she ate breakfast because it was bothering her so much so she took matters into her own hands and pulled it out on our way to church. In our driveway as we were leaving. The one next to it is loose as is her top right one.
We thought it would be fun to take MAX and see a Beaver game. We left after the 4th inning. So what does that tell you... they are still a little young. We could have just rode MAX all over the place because they liked that part the best.
She wiggled her tooth all day on Saturday. Asked Daddy to pull it Saturday night when he got off work and he wouldn't- said it wasn't ready. She cried when she ate breakfast because it was bothering her so much so she took matters into her own hands and pulled it out on our way to church. In our driveway as we were leaving. The one next to it is loose as is her top right one.
We thought it would be fun to take MAX and see a Beaver game. We left after the 4th inning. So what does that tell you... they are still a little young. We could have just rode MAX all over the place because they liked that part the best.
Friday, July 16, 2010
Thursday, July 15, 2010
A Day in the life....
I figured out what my problem is.... my inner turmoil with this frustration I've been carrying around. It's that every week, every day is like Groundhog's day for me. It's the same, we have a routine because that is how this house, this family, can function best. I am just on cruise control, automatic pilot and I long for more time. My biggest issue is about time-there's not enough time in the day. It's not complaining per se because I don't- I'm not grumbling... I'm just at this point where I feel like I am struggling??? or it's just a constant race, me against the clock to see who can win.
Today for example
5am- alarm goes off so I can run 3 miles
hit alarm off roll over and accidentally fall back asleep
6am- wake up and panic
shower, make bed, get dressed, get kids up at 6:40, make their beds, put clothes in dryer
brush their teeth, get them to potty, wash their hands, do abby's hair, get aidan dressed
7:01 downstairs feed kids, feed dog, make mine and Rick's lunches for the next day
poop dog, eat cereal, load dishwasher
7:20 finish my hair, load car, put ice things in kids lunches
7:45 leave house, drive to Costco to get gas, drop kids at daycare
8:09 get coffee, stop at winco for cibatta bread
8:37 LATE for work
4:05 pick kids up
home 4:25ish unload car, check mail, wash hands, give juice, take cooper outside, make kids lunches for next day, unload dishwasher, take cooper out again to poop, my mom comes over to visit, make dinner, wrap Coopers birthday presents (don't ask)
5:55 eat with kids, clean up kitchen, vacuum downstairs, mop downstairs bathroom and hardwood floors, pick up toys
7:03 upstairs unload dryer, kids in bath
7:34 kids out of bath, brush teeth, dry abby's hair, trim abby's bangs, put load in washer
7:50 read to kids, prayers, bed, fold and put away clothes, change into running clothes
8:07 run only 2 miles still full from dinner and want to barf
8:34 finish scrubbing downstairs floors
9:08 upstairs to pound out this rambling post
9:30 hopefully in bed reading scripture, watch a little tv or movie with hubs and nighty night by 10:15ish
And tomorrow it starts all over only I'll be running at 5am since Friday night is grocery shopping night and possibly some ironing needs to be done. Most nights I even do dinner prep for the following night's meal. And there is all the background noise in the my head saying, don't forget to write the note the for the kids that they are missing next Wed, and don't forget to mail the birthday card (to the wrong house ha ha), or take the so and so out of the freezer, or don't forget to re-paint your toenails (yeah weird like that).
I'm not trying to be indulgent. There are plenty of working mom's with more than 2 kids, and even single mothers who do it all alone. I have PLENTY of help, even as I'm running on the treadmill tonight my husband greets me with, "What can I do to help?" And on Wed, Thurs and Fri I don't even put in a full 8 hours at work. I used to read scripture in the morning, but Abby is an early riser, or I would do it when I was eating my cereal, but the kids were a distraction and again- race against the clock to get us out the door. So I feel like He gets my leftovers. As does my husband. Serve HIM first, serve your husband. I'm failing.... and flailing. I keep hubs fed-make his lunch, he comes home to dinner and a clean house at least and his clothes are ironed. We've talked about maybe selling this house and buying something smaller but what does that change? Less square footage to clean??? There will still be living to do and lunches to make. It all just reminds me of that commercial, where they say life comes at you fast. This is why I get emotional when the loose tooth comes, or a milestone is reached, because I am rushing... rushing through the day, to get to the next task and I don't want to miss a thing. I don't want to miss out and yet it's passing me by. I am content. That's a good thing. Frustrated sure.... tired definitely but we have our health, each other, we're employed, we're fed. HE MEETS OUR NEEDS.
I don't really have a complete thought from all of this other than it was just an ah-ha moment today. I've been really struggling for months now, trying to figure it out- even questioning if I was/am suffering from depression. But it's all just about being on auto-pilot. I feel like I've been doing that for so long that I forgot/am forgetting how to LIVE outside of this routine. Even to say, I feel like I lost my mind- not in just the forgetful things I do all the time, but just not having to use my brain. I miss my brain. Funny- I could have just wrote that one sentence. It says it all.
Today for example
5am- alarm goes off so I can run 3 miles
hit alarm off roll over and accidentally fall back asleep
6am- wake up and panic
shower, make bed, get dressed, get kids up at 6:40, make their beds, put clothes in dryer
brush their teeth, get them to potty, wash their hands, do abby's hair, get aidan dressed
7:01 downstairs feed kids, feed dog, make mine and Rick's lunches for the next day
poop dog, eat cereal, load dishwasher
7:20 finish my hair, load car, put ice things in kids lunches
7:45 leave house, drive to Costco to get gas, drop kids at daycare
8:09 get coffee, stop at winco for cibatta bread
8:37 LATE for work
4:05 pick kids up
home 4:25ish unload car, check mail, wash hands, give juice, take cooper outside, make kids lunches for next day, unload dishwasher, take cooper out again to poop, my mom comes over to visit, make dinner, wrap Coopers birthday presents (don't ask)
5:55 eat with kids, clean up kitchen, vacuum downstairs, mop downstairs bathroom and hardwood floors, pick up toys
7:03 upstairs unload dryer, kids in bath
7:34 kids out of bath, brush teeth, dry abby's hair, trim abby's bangs, put load in washer
7:50 read to kids, prayers, bed, fold and put away clothes, change into running clothes
8:07 run only 2 miles still full from dinner and want to barf
8:34 finish scrubbing downstairs floors
9:08 upstairs to pound out this rambling post
9:30 hopefully in bed reading scripture, watch a little tv or movie with hubs and nighty night by 10:15ish
And tomorrow it starts all over only I'll be running at 5am since Friday night is grocery shopping night and possibly some ironing needs to be done. Most nights I even do dinner prep for the following night's meal. And there is all the background noise in the my head saying, don't forget to write the note the for the kids that they are missing next Wed, and don't forget to mail the birthday card (to the wrong house ha ha), or take the so and so out of the freezer, or don't forget to re-paint your toenails (yeah weird like that).
I'm not trying to be indulgent. There are plenty of working mom's with more than 2 kids, and even single mothers who do it all alone. I have PLENTY of help, even as I'm running on the treadmill tonight my husband greets me with, "What can I do to help?" And on Wed, Thurs and Fri I don't even put in a full 8 hours at work. I used to read scripture in the morning, but Abby is an early riser, or I would do it when I was eating my cereal, but the kids were a distraction and again- race against the clock to get us out the door. So I feel like He gets my leftovers. As does my husband. Serve HIM first, serve your husband. I'm failing.... and flailing. I keep hubs fed-make his lunch, he comes home to dinner and a clean house at least and his clothes are ironed. We've talked about maybe selling this house and buying something smaller but what does that change? Less square footage to clean??? There will still be living to do and lunches to make. It all just reminds me of that commercial, where they say life comes at you fast. This is why I get emotional when the loose tooth comes, or a milestone is reached, because I am rushing... rushing through the day, to get to the next task and I don't want to miss a thing. I don't want to miss out and yet it's passing me by. I am content. That's a good thing. Frustrated sure.... tired definitely but we have our health, each other, we're employed, we're fed. HE MEETS OUR NEEDS.
I don't really have a complete thought from all of this other than it was just an ah-ha moment today. I've been really struggling for months now, trying to figure it out- even questioning if I was/am suffering from depression. But it's all just about being on auto-pilot. I feel like I've been doing that for so long that I forgot/am forgetting how to LIVE outside of this routine. Even to say, I feel like I lost my mind- not in just the forgetful things I do all the time, but just not having to use my brain. I miss my brain. Funny- I could have just wrote that one sentence. It says it all.
Wednesday, July 14, 2010
Back in Business
Washing machine works!
Five days I think we went without it. The whole family took a trip to the laundromat Monday night and we did six loads. This laundry sign is actually in our laundry room- it's from Uppercase Living.... a great way to change up the decor in your home...
Abby has her 2nd loose tooth! Not much else to yap about...
Sunday, July 11, 2010
This is
the disaster that is was our house. I know one day I will miss it.
The washing machine lasted one load. My mom, bless her, worked all day Saturday at Urgent Care and came over and picked up our laundry, washed it and brought it back.
The washing machine lasted one load. My mom, bless her, worked all day Saturday at Urgent Care and came over and picked up our laundry, washed it and brought it back.
Oh... I did work in Aidan's Sunday School Class last week- and he "let" me. Whew! Rick golfed today in preparation for his annual work golf tourney. He also rented a mini pump to drain the rest of our pond. It was and still is in dire need of cleaning. As for me, I took some mini naps.
Washer repairman comes tomorrow!! CAN'T WAIT.
Thursday, July 8, 2010
Bad Boy Jake and other randomness
A few months ago the kids were playing and kept talking about Bad Boy Jake.
Every now and then Bad Boy Jake comes up... I ask who he is and where is he from- is he from a book? TV? School? a movie? Abby says he is made up and he lives in the garbage can in his underwear. So our kids share an imaginary friend. At least I hope he's imaginary.
Every now and then Bad Boy Jake comes up... I ask who he is and where is he from- is he from a book? TV? School? a movie? Abby says he is made up and he lives in the garbage can in his underwear. So our kids share an imaginary friend. At least I hope he's imaginary.
When we were watching fireworks on the 4th Aidan spotted these two kids playing with these glow-in-the-dark light saber swords. He asked what they were, we told him, to which he replied, I want one so I can whack someone. Nice. Boys are such... boys.
Good week sorta... loved the weather, the kids got pool time and bike riding in. Rick's been running 5 miles now when he goes so I went for 5 Tuesday morning. My legs are like jello...I'm not sure I could do 5 each time. Well duh, there is no way. I could only go 4 on Wednesday and could barely squeak out 3 yesterday. Kudos to him though.
Aidan says Grows for Girls. He will say No Grows Allowed...Or Abby's a Grow and I'm a Boy... Or I played with a Grow today at school Mama...
Our washing machine broke last night. I had a hard time falling asleep because I was fretting over it. The washing machine is like breathing. It's like food and water. I left work early to meet the repair man. He was able to get it to turn and told me I should be able to use it this weekend and he would be back with the part on Monday. Not cheap.
Tuesday, July 6, 2010
More Weekend
Fireworks at home with the annual ice cream treat
All I can say is poor Cooper
Giving Daddy love
Loves to practice tying on Daddy's shoes- proud of this one
My babies
At Tigard High School waiting for dark
Freezing cold
All I can say is poor Cooper
Giving Daddy love
Loves to practice tying on Daddy's shoes- proud of this one
My babies
At Tigard High School waiting for dark
Freezing cold
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